Top #20 - Competition

My birthday is here, and once again we will be competing for a spot in the top #20 Miss MFC. I want to remind everyone that while this is a fun and friendly competition, it is still competitive. I would ask my members to keep a positive attitude and adhere closely to the "if you don't have anything nice to say, stfu" rule.

I don't want to down play the competitive aspect of all this. It's there, we can't deny it. But we can choose to conduct ourselves in a mature way and we can choose to gain a positive perspective from it.

Not so much in a writing mood....

But there is this, so...

Happy Hump Day!

-Zoe

Anxiety, Depression, Change...

I have been affected by anxiety since I can remember. When I was 8 years old, my friend in ballet class used to call me the "worry wart." I was always so concerned with details, concerned with doing well, afraid of messing up.

In middle school during English class, the boy behind me kept kicking the back of my chair. After a few days of this, I finally worked up the nerve to turn around and tell him to quit, only to be immediately yelled at by my teacher. She didn't see the whole situation, she just saw me turning to tell off a boy. I was so embarrassed, I cried.

   

 In high school, I began to experience panic attacks and night terrors. My dad took me to the doctor and after being treated for ulcers I had developed from stress, I was diagnosed with a panic disorder. In large classes, I would become so overwhelmed by hearing all the talking during free time that every few weeks I was getting in trouble for walking off campus and going home without informing anyone. After my diagnosis, I was allowed to sit in the counselor's office if I needed to leave class and she would do paper work while I read Alexander Dumas.

It's been a while!!

So, according to this here blog, I haven't written in a year and a month...

Sorry about that but OH MY!! What a busy year it has been!!

When I wrote last, I was just about to move out of state. I am pleased to inform you, if you don't already know, that my move was a success! Next month, I'm moving again but only across the street this time :)

I'm looking forward to bigger windows, a better view, cement floors, and internet connections post 2002. I'm super excited. My move in date is 2 days before my birthday so it will be like getting a cute apartment as a gift! To myself!! Also, I am in the process of buying myself a few acres next to my grandma and this year my plan is to begin working on a house there. All more magical opportunities, thanks to you guys.

The biggest news I want to share with you now is my website. I am in the process of developing an paid member site where you can not only follow me like other social media, you can actually join and receive lots of cool stuff directly!

I guess that's why blogs are on my mind. My new site will have video and picture content in addition to a blog that I will update like, every day. I'm both excited and nervous. If you haven't noticed, I like writing and I like people reading my stuff, but it is going to take an extra dose of discipline on my part to do this daily and consistently. I can't wait!! I love a challenge.

I hope you guys can get excited about this with me!! You've already shown so much support in other areas and with out you, I wouldn't have the opportunity for yet another creative outlet.

Anyway, you're awesome. And as always, thank you so much for reading. I'm keeping it short and sweet today.